Shortly before I retired from the military, I ‘happened’ upon a racing organization in Canada. I had a deep sense the Lord wanted us to minister with this group yet had no contact with anyone within the group.

With no clue who to talk to, nor what it would be like to cross the border post 9-11, I made contact with one of the associations racers. I asked about the possibility of racing with the group. He thought it was a great idea and encouraged me to race with them during the coming year. Placing our trust in the Lord, we stepped out to race and hopefully minister in Canada.

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For years I lived under constant condemnation from the ‘laws’ I was brought up under during my childhood. My grandmother was a great lady, but very religious. Her religion affected everybody around her. Unfortunately, that attitude, coupled with a constant stream of hypocrisy, turned me away from the church in my teens. I walked away from the Lord because I was just a sinner and ‘going to hell’ anyways, so what did it matter?

In the early to mid 90’s, I was introduced to God’s grace and mercy. Actually, I was introduced to a loving Father who wanted the best for me. It would take me years to delete the religious upbringing etched in my DNA.

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One of the biggest mistakes any person considering following Jesus can make is thinking they have to ‘get it all together’ before they make a commitment to follow Jesus. This was one of the reasons it took me so long to return to the Father’s house. I really thought I had to have myself all squared away in order to be acceptable to Him. I could not have been more wrong. Talk about walking into the glory of our Lord with a mess…

There is someone reading this today who is seriously considering following Jesus but does not think they are worthy or that God can forgive them…you think it’s just to much to ask. Jesus tells us in Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

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A couple of years ago I read a book written by Kyle Idleman title, ‘Not A Fan’. In the book, Idleman describes the differences between being a fan of Jesus and being His follower. What he explained boiled down to the difference between being a Sunday Christian or daily follower of Jesus.

As Christ followers, we can not compartmentalize our lives. There can be no part of our life that is hidden from the Lord. Sounds almost amusing doesn’t it, trying to hide something from the creator of the universe. Open and transparent to our King allows light to shine into every nook and cranny of our lives. Yes, at times my past is deeply embarrassing, however, He uses that past to bring others to Him because of the depth of forgiveness I have received.

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When you’re waiting for God’s timing, the enemy will work his hardest to bring doubt and condemnation into your mind. This is the place I find myself today, struggling with the ‘what ifs’ of tomorrow compounded by the ‘what dids’ of yesterday. The enemy will use the truths of your past to condemn you.

Yes, I did many things wrong in the past, things I’m ashamed of, things I wished had never happened. The truth is, they did happen. When I’m in a time of testing, a time of waiting on the Lord, the enemy floods my mind with those truths.

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